New Year’s resolutions for Nintendo characters


In their January issue, Nintendo Power compiled a fun list of New Year’s resolutions for your “favorite and not-so-favorite video game characters.” Here are the ones that made me chuckle, if not outright laugh in the case of Starman:

  • Pitt: Stop fighting it and legally change his name to Kid Icarus.
  • Phoenix Wright: Stop going to Sonic’s barber.
  • Shy Guy: Read a few books on self-esteem.
  • Samus: Destroy eight more planets and drive at least two more species into extinction in the name of galactic peace.
  • Link: Take some classes on public speaking.
  • Starman from Pro Wrestling: Cut eyeholes in mask.
  • Dog from Duck Hunt: Stop taking pleasure from other people’s misfortunes.
  • Kin Corn Darn: Change his nickname from “a living karate tool” to something less insulting.
  • Professor Layton: Grow a beard and become the world’s top Abraham Lincoln impersonator.

Any resolutions you’d like to make on behalf of a video game character?


  1. I love Pro Wrestling and the 8-bit era of Wrestling games. Shortly into the 16-bit era they became so complex that I lost all interest. I guess it’s the nature of the beast, but I never quite understood those complex wrestling sims we have now.

    I thought Samus’ was the best.

  2. star man has eye holes the little black squares (kinda like the pictures that cover bus windows they have little holes to let the driver and occupants see out)