New Year’s resolutions for Nintendo characters

Infendo

In their January issue, Nintendo Power compiled a fun list of New Year’s resolutions for your “favorite and not-so-favorite video game characters.” Here are the ones that made me chuckle, if not outright laugh in the case of Starman:

  • Pitt: Stop fighting it and legally change his name to Kid Icarus.
  • Phoenix Wright: Stop going to Sonic’s barber.
  • Shy Guy: Read a few books on self-esteem.
  • Samus: Destroy eight more planets and drive at least two more species into extinction in the name of galactic peace.
  • Link: Take some classes on public speaking.
  • Starman from Pro Wrestling: Cut eyeholes in mask.
  • Dog from Duck Hunt: Stop taking pleasure from other people’s misfortunes.
  • Kin Corn Darn: Change his nickname from “a living karate tool” to something less insulting.
  • Professor Layton: Grow a beard and become the world’s top Abraham Lincoln impersonator.

Any resolutions you’d like to make on behalf of a video game character?